Over heard in NYC

I was told about this website today...really entertained me...I think stand up comedians get some of their materials from hear..no I am positive!

I dont believe they dont use any jokes where Canadians are involved! not even our thanksgiving!

Enjoy

The Golden Rule Doesn't Apply to Telecommunications, Lady

Old woman, to woman talking on Bluetooth headset: Excuse me, but are you talking to yourself?

Woman just looks at her and keeps talking.

Old woman: No, seriously! Are you talking to yourself? Because, if you are, you should be nicer to yourself.

--Central Park

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NewsFlash: Eccentric Dean of Electoral College Invokes Little-Known Constitutional Provision

Hobo: Attention, attention! I'm playing this saxophone to raise money for my spaceship!

Plays a horrible rendition of "Pop Goes the Weasel."

Hobo: I'm going into space, and I'm taking George Bush with me!

Fellow passengers cheer.

--1 train

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My Motto: Binge in Private, Purge in Public

Cashier: What will it be?
Customer: Large bucket, large fries, four Diet Cokes.
Cashier: Is this for here or to go?
Customer: Does it look like I can eat all that here?
Cashier: Chill, bitch... I don't know your life!

--KFC, Brooklyn

Overheard by: pat

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The Buddha Was a Tough Kid to Raise

Mother: Don't you ever do that again! [slaps child hard]
Child, calmly: Well, are you happy with yourself?

--Union Square

Overheard by: Miranda

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It's Okay-- It's His Job to Stand There

Tourist man: Pardon me, officer, can you tell us where Orchard Street is?
Cop: See that naked Chinese guy?
Tourist man: Ummm...Yeah.
Cop: Walk down to him and make a left.
Tourist man: Um, thanks.
Cop: No problem.

--Delancey & Allen

Overheard by: Isaac

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Starbucks: Where Six of One is Not a Half-Dozen of the Other

Employee: Ma'am, can I help you?
Woman: I'd like a half dozen of your chocolate chip cookies.
Employee: We only sell them, like, 1, 2, 3...
Woman to friend: Is she serious?
Friend: She'll take 6.

--Starbucks, Rockefeller Center Concourse

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Maybe You Should Get a Job at Starbucks Instead

Customer: I'll have a twelve-inch wheat --
Deli guy: Foot-long, or half?
Customer: Um... twelve inches. Isn't that a foot?
Deli guy: Foot-long, or half?
Customer: I think you're missing something here.

--Subway, Elmsford

Overheard by: Bored Beyond Belief

This happened to me once...except I was on the other end. I was so used to metrics when I moved here. I hated inches and foot.
I remember asking for the 6 inch....so you want half a foot maam. Moi: NO. Just 6 inches please with a diet coke!
I sure got some look that day from that little Asian lady.

Why do I wish if it's 1988 again..

I was tagged by Isam :

Why do you wish you were three?

Give me at least 5 reasons. And if you want to tag someone else go ahead.

**I have to note that it was very difficult to remember anything before my first day at kindergarten. Facts might get mixed up. This is as far as I could remember! (age 4-6)

1) People actually avoided disturbing my sleep....ah how sweet!

2) Cerelac...yumm. I think i might eat a little if I had access to children food

3) Some Remi Bendali songs. I felt like a bird every time she sang ' teri teri ya 3asfora'

4) My mom's story telling and singing.

5) Easily excited. No worries. Mommy could fix any problem!

6) Being able to hide under the bed and behind the curtains

7) Love and affection I got a s the first child. I feel lucky when I see that in my baby pictures.

I tag who ever comes across this...trust me its good to think about how sweet it is to be 3!

YOU GOTTA DO THIS and let me know so I can readit :)

I tag dandoon.

Grand re-opening!

GOSH it has been along time since I have considered checking on my blog. Well now I have to, since my dear cousin has tagged me :)
I think it is good to be back, older,wiser and strongr .............................bs balash
Ramadan Kareem everyone!